I Never Believed This Was Possible – But Now I Do

“How amazing and emotional being a father can be. There is no way to describe the joy you get from being a father.”

Today I was sent pictures from my son’s 6 1/2 Birthday party.  I know 6 1/2 . . . long story.  Anyway, while looking at the pictures it reminded me of the wonderful things I from being a father.  I get to share in the joy of my sons. and I get to share in the development of someone that hopefully becomes a better person than I am.

When I found out I was going to be a dad, I said I wanted to be a better father then my dad.  I said I want to give my son, all the love I got from my father, and all the security I didn’t.  So I created my own person statement that I strive to live and I said it to my first son when he was only a couple of days old.

“I want to be the kind of father that stands BEHIND you when you need help, stands BESIDE you when you need encouragement, and stands IN FRONT of you when need protection.”

I realized during the birthday party, that I need my sons just as much as they need me.  When my six year old gave his crying friend his own balloon, because his friend lost his, it touched my heart that I’m helping him find compassion.  When my 2 year got overwhelmed and starting calling for Daddy and needed me to hold him away from the crowd, I knew I was teaching him that he can find safety in my arms.  I know this sounds sappy, but both of those moments made me feel needed.  It’s not always easy being a father, you have to find balance between being tough and “manly” while at the same time letting your kids know it’s ok to cry, show emotions, and be affectionate.

When I left the party, to go back to work, my kids hugged and kissed and said they were going to miss me.  That touched my heart, it made me think about what my dad missed out on, and what fathers who don’t take the time out to know their kids miss out on in life.  My mom was always there for me when I was a kid, but I could have used that strong male figure when I was growing up.  I know someday it won’t be cool to hug on daddy or tell daddy you love or miss him, but for now, I’m eating it up.    For now I will look at the pictures, and remember the sounds, and recall each hug . . . and know that I may not give my kids everything they want, but by God I will give them everything I can and along the way, they will make me a better person.

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Comments
7 Responses to “I Never Believed This Was Possible – But Now I Do”
  1. Such an awesome post…from the heart! loved it! More men need to follow in your shoes!!

  2. Lori says:

    Let me give you some hope – I’m not sure that your boys will ever be too old to hug or kiss you. Our son is turning 20 in a few months and he STILL kisses and hugs BOTH his father and I when we come home and before bed. If hugs and kisses are big in your family and naturally given, I believe they will always be a part of how those children show love and affection and it won’t feel silly or to them. I’m going to check back with you in about 10-15 years and I’m willing to bet that you are still getting those hugs my friend.

  3. Eddie, You are such a BEAUTIFUL MAN!!! You are doing an EXCELLENT Job at being a FATHER!!!! I ❤ You More each day!!! *Hugs*

  4. Kyra says:

    This is so amazingly sweet! You are an awesome Dad!

  5. I love this bro. Being a father is a pretty freaking amazing and the words you used to describe it were spot on. Thanks for sharing this!

  6. yumyucky says:

    This post. It’s wonderful. To hear a father speak from the heart like this – especially a black man – it’s beautiful. I never knew my father and there are many in the black community, especially, that don’t have relationship with their father. So thank you for being a real man (regardless of your color).

    My husband didn’t know his father either. But together he and I are raising four children. 🙂

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